A friend asked me today whether I would be going home for Aidilfitri. I believe the question should be, when. As far as I’m concerned, not to return home for Aidilfitri is not an option, simply because my Mak is expecting everyone to be home for the festival, no matter how tight our schedules are or how crazy the traffic heading north would be at this time of the year.

Like I said, not to go home is not an option. I missed celebrating Aidilfitri with Mak only twice – once in mid-80s when I was a bachelor in Kuching and wanted to find out how they do it there, and again in late-90s when I was already married and living in KL. You wouldn’t want to know the “lectures” I got from Mak and my siblings, and how guilty I felt after that.

As cliché as it seems, Aidilfitri is the time to seek for forgiveness, share the good food and strengthen family bonds. To me it is also more than just that. It is the time of the year when Mak is in her element playing the role of mother to all her children. I could imagine her already fussing about where which child and his/her family would be sleeping when they come home. She would also be excitedly planning the menu for Hari Raya and the days before and after, making sure to cook each of her children’s favourite dish.

I genuinely believe that comes Aidilfitri, Mak sees us as her little boys and girls again. How we excitedly prepared our home for the festival. How we laughed and joked with each other, and the teasing – about the colour of our brand new baju raya, hair style, shoes etc… The girls would be helping her in the kitchen and the boys, as usual, would either be lounging around or letting off firecrackers somewhere with the other boys, whose sisters also would be busy helping their mothers.

It is true that Mak now spends most of her time at our homes, a week with one daughter, another week with the other, and one more week with a son, and another week or a day or two with the other. After making her rounds, she would return home. Yes, we get to see Mak often but I guess, somehow, those meetings are just not the same as when we gather at our family home with our mother for a single occasion that means a lot to Mak. Only at home, Mak would feel at ease with everything and wouldn’t be feeling awkward.

Years ago as we were growing up, Mak and Pak would be trying their best to make each Hari Raya a joyous one for us by making sure we each get new baju raya and shoes. As children, these seemed to be the most important aspect for celebrating Aidilfitri. It must not have been easy for Pak to provide all those for our big family, but somehow we were never without new clothes for the day. There would always be a wide sumptious spread on the table.

Now that Pak is no longer with us and Mak is alone, I believe it is our duty as children to be there with her during that auspicious day. I guess Mak is not asking for us to come home with goodies and gifts; she just wants us to come home and fill the house as a family again.

Yes, I will go home to be with Mak this Aidilfitri and hope to continue doing so for as along as she is still with us. Mak is 80+ now and realistically speaking, her “light is dimming”. While she is still alive, I, as her son, will make her happy. No doubt, Mak is not sharp any more and very sensitive now. Yes, I do get a good share of her scoldings still but I would rather be scolded than not to have her with us. When she is no longer around, going home will never be same anymore….

Sometimes, we take for granted that our parents would always be there and we don’t think about their presence so much. Suddenly, wham!, they are gone and only then we begin to appreciate their existence. Life is full of mysteries and surprises, my friend. It can take a turn for the best or worst in a fraction of a second.

Take my wife for instance. We had gone home to Alor Setar for Aidilfitri in October 2006. We spent a lot of time with her Mummy. She was healthy and joyful. A couple of weeks after we had returned to KL, Mummy fell sick with lung cancer. Hardly three months later, Mummy passed away. Now, returning home to Alor Setar is never the same for my wife and children anymore. And each time we passed by Mummy's home, which is now rented out, I could see tears welling in my wife's eyes, and also the children's. They would be looking at the house and longing for Mummy. I would too.

You see, I don't like surprises....

This son, as always, will be returning home this Aidifitri. And, as always, he will be the first at Mak’s doorstep.

We had gathered for Iftar in Subang Jaya yesterday and also to celebrate a double birthday, that of Mama and my brother-in-law, Zaid.


Happy Birthday!


Mama, groovy... I am visualising you and Daddy zipping through town in the beemer with the top down!


Zaid, take it easy at work, bro.

Jika mahu mendapat manfaat yang berlipat ganda daripada prestasi sumber manusia, cara kita menilai mereka mesti berubah. Kita mesti berpegang kepada prinsip teras bahawa pekerja adalah aset pertubuhan yang paling berharga, dan sesungguhnya mereka berupaya mencipta kejayaan luar biasa. Yang penting sekali ialah kita mesti menyakinkan mereka tentang hakikat itu.

Pada saya adalah tidak memadai jika kita sekadar melayan mereka dengan baik dan kemudian mengguna mereka dengan baik. Kita sepatutnya membantu aset kita itu merasakan apa yang dikerjakan itu amat bermakna dan memberikan kepuasan.

Mereka tidak mahu diguna atau dijadikan mangsa atau alat oleh pertubuhan. Mereka mahu merasakan bahawa mereka memainkan peranan yang penting, bernilai dan berhak ke atas sumber-sumber di bawah jagaan mereka.

Mereka mahu merasakan bahawa mereka memberikan sumbangan peribadi kepada sesuatu yang bermakna. Setelah itu kita akan lihat betapa terasang dan puasnya mereka.

Ketika itulah potensi seseorang akan benar-benar terserlah dan semua tenaga dan daya kreativiti yang terpendam, akan membuak-buak dan melimpah. Seorang pemikir, Goethe, berkata: “ Jika kamu melayan seseorang itu seadanya, maka dia akan kekal seadanya tetapi jika kamu melayan seseorang itu dengan keyakinan bahawa dia boleh dan pasti boleh, dia akan boleh dan pasti boleh melakukannya.”

Sesungguhnya kita mesti yakin dengan potensi seseorang itu yang tidak kelihatan. Jika tidak, kita hanya mendapat prestasi “status quo” sahaja – semuanya seperti biasa atau “business as usual”.

Sebenarnya kebanyakan daripada kita dapat melakukan sesuatu jauh lebih baik daripada yang diperlukan atau dibenarkan dalam skop pekerjaan kita. Masalahnya, pengurusan selalunya tidak percaya.

Mendiang Konosuke Matsushita, pengasas dan presiden konglomerat elektronik ternama Jepun, mengatakan begini: “ Kita akan menang dan kuasa-kuasa industri Barat akan kalah; tidak dapat dielakkan kerana kegagalan kamu (industrialis barat) berpunca daripada diri kamu sendiri…Bagi kamu, prinsip pengurusan adalah mendapatkan idea daripada ketua-ketua dan menurunkannya ke tangan para pekerja.”

Dalam erti kata lain, yang perlu ditukar adalah cara pengurusan berfikir iaitu pada mereka, buah fikiran yang bernas hanya datang dari peringkat atasan; paradigma lama yang menjerut banyak organisasi.

Ia hampir sama dengan kepercayaan perubatan cara berbekam. Dahulu orang percaya penyakit disebabkan darah kotor yang mesti dibuang melalui berbekam. Kemudian Semmelweiss, Pasteur dan saintis-saintis ternama lain menemui kuman dan bakteria; sekaligus pandangan tentang penyakit serta nilai-nilai rawatan dan perubatan pun berubah. Evolusi pemikiran, pandangan dan nilai yang sama perlu berlaku dalam pengurusan dan kepimpinan. Paradigma teras perlu ditukar, dan ia mesti berlaku segera jika sesebuah organisasi tidak mahu lewes.

Alkisahnya… begitulah, bak kata orang putih; my two cents.

Selamat tinggal kawan dan detik kita bersama.

Seakan baru kelmarin kita bertemu di dalam mimpi.

Engkau telah mengalunkan lagu merdu ketika aku keseorangan, dan aku, ketika engkau kesepian, membina menara sehingga menerjah langit nan biru.

Namun kita harus bingkas bangun dan tidak boleh lagi diulit mimpi kerana subuh sudahpun berlalu dan mentari sudah setinggi galah.

Air yang pasang dinihari tadi mulai surut dan bahtera yang menantiku sudah mengibarkan layarnya. Maafkan aku kawan kerana masa sudah sampai untuk kita berpisah.

Seandainya engkau dan aku bertemu lagi ketika kenangan mula berbalam di senja nanti, aku akan menyapa mu semula dan engkau akan mengalunkan lagu yang lebih syahdu.

Dan, seandainya tangan kita tersentuh dalam mimpi baru, kita akan bina sebuah lagi menara di langit nan biru…….

Kawan, jangan kita berduka kerana berpisah.

Ketahuilah bahawasanya, kasih kita mungkin lebih nyata dalam perpisahan. Bukankah gunung itu tampak lebih jelas pada pendaki daripada jika direnung dari kakinya?

Terima kasih kawan kerana engkau tidak sahaja merapati aku ketika bala menimpamu, malah juga ketika laba melimpah ruah.

Terima kasih kawan kerana tidak hanya bersama aku ketika engkau bosan di masa luang mu tetapi juga di waktu engkau boleh lokek untuk berkongsi saat bahagia hidup mu.

Percayalah kawan, kemanisan persahabatan kita dipenuhi gelak ketawa dan keikhlasan dalam berkongsi nikmatnya, yang mendinginkan air mata yang mengalir di pipi sehinggakan tidak terasa pedih luka pada hati yang tercalar